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[Applause]

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everyone I'm a little drunk in this

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audio segment we're talking about the

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Indonesian pygmy sighting I struggle to

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read as I always do just now a little

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bit more impaired check the video

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description for links to the story and

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the video we go off on many tangents and

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loop it all back around to cryptozoology

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Bigfoot and a whole bunch of other

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things thanks for listening and I will

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talk to you later I have right now let's

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let me just pay I'm having a domino pain

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but I have a story right now for

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everyone not there this is a new video

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that has come out this is like a a weird

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Indonesian video it is an article this

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comes from Krypton mundo dot-com and

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this is a reported video of a pygmy in

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Indonesian pygmy jumping out in the

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front of a bunch of like motocross guys

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running down this road and then being

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followed like I finally on the feed is

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fishy I rang Ben deck yeah like the

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Vietnamese kind of like Bigfoot but it's

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smaller much smaller these guys it looks

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like a [\h__\h] pygmy I'll play I'll play

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the audio i know you must mean right now

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but just listen to it and I'll describe

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it in detail please there's a song right

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now here and it's gonna go into some

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motocross guys going whatever is gonna

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wreck up around the bend and it the bend

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turns to the right the wreck and then

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pops a pygmy it looks like a guy in the

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loincloth running down this two lane

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dirt road and then the motocrosser

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drives to the right and the pygmy dies

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off to the left now that's about it

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right there now this comes so this is

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from the Oracle is this a member of the

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Indonesian lost pygmy try mysterious

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small figure is caught on camera screen

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out of the undergrowth in remote area of

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North Sumatra well those guys because

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they definitely saw something on video

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could say there are stopping and getting

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off their bikes and looking's it doesn't

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think of a CGI there they were seeing

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something yeah I don't think this is CG

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re I think this is something real here

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no I don't care all looking for it I

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don't know if this is like fakery if

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they put like some kind of child up to

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do this boat I I don't know at this

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point the person

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spotted in Vanek the northern tip of

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Sumatra he appeared to be half naked and

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ran down dirt track carried a large

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stick after a group of bikers chased him

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the man dived into the budget brushes

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bushes and disappeared in 2013 2003

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archeologists found evidence of an

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ancient race of small Hobbit like humans

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on the island of floors or Flores on the

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other side of the Apple Lagoon

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all right well you trace the archipelago

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yeah it looks like it looks like the The

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Dude's holding something - yeah he's

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only he's only the spear yeah that's

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pretty much that's something else man do

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you think do you think they're go or do

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you think they put out so this is what

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I'm asking if this by these beam or not

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be Mex bikers the motocross sirs then

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the Brydon we're on the trail you gonna

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[\h__\h] that thing or not like I don't know

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yes revenge for missing four and one

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Jesus is bad no I can't we need we need

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new material I you're right

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we're really moving worse you're gonna

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[\h__\h] it man

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that's all this podcast is a Bigfoot can

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i [\h__\h] it can i [\h__\h] those that's all

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this is dude you're right we need a new

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stick it's bad but usually I bring this

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up so let's say this story is legitimate

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and that there is like a small tribe of

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pygmies out there in Indonesia and these

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are like smaller humanoids and you might

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want to you might ask like Oh what is a

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what is a pygmy a pygmy is a member of

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an ethnic group whose average height is

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usually short and they're probably

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justifying to pick me as a member for

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any group of adult men where the average

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height is less than four feet in 11

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inches that's about a hundred and fifty

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centimeters that defines a pygmy so if

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there's pygmy like random weird pygmy

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tribes out there why can't there be a

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Bigfoot or Sasquatch that mean less

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populate less less populated but still

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the same if there's like humanoid

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pygmies out there in a tribe why not a

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Bigfoot why not a troll why not a goat

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man it seems completely plausible

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there's so many different Amazon tribes

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they have yet to be discovered or have

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been discovered and they just don't want

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anything to do with the modern world

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there is an island off of India and Sri

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Lanka that had you can't step foot on

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there if you're from the modern world

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those [\h__\h] kill you

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vice the hell you're on it north I think

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is the North Sentinel island or

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something yeah it's like so there are

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these pockets there's these pockets of

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non modernization that go on and

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something but sometimes the modern world

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bumps into this weird other primitive

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world doesn't make anyone less real than

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the other but sometimes they run into

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another one another and that's what I

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think maybe happened here

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I'm not want an egg all fake yeah sure

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when I'm willing to take it for what it

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is and talk about the possibilities of

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the really demon a pygmy tribe in

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Indonesia that's fine

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laws with me I mean we've seen reports

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of like Bigfoot skunk Apes I've seen a

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lot of stories about skunk ape you type

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in skunk ape right now in Google type in

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news it's gonna come down the Florida

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there's reports of skunk apes in Florida

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right now not a big [\h__\h] deal this

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this is going on I don't think it's that

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far-fetched to consider this is real

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that Bigfoot is real and all these other

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weird things that we read about it might

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be some validity to it it's not that not

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that's not that far stretch I don't

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think at this point

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especially if this pygmy story is true I

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think it gives even more validity to

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Sasquatch and Bigfoot because these are

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people these guys man people do weird

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[\h__\h] there you can kind of relate to a

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person who I mean whether or not they're

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in a tribe or not you can kind of get

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into her mentality you know they want to

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explore they see weird bikes and stuff

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like that yeah they want to interact a

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little bit yeah they're scared but

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you'll interact with them a little bit

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not that not that far off I think is

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somewhat reasonable there's a lot of

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stories about this two pygmy tribes

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there's photographs

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the only thing I'm disappointed about

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with this video on this trail I can't

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get a good look at this guy's donkey

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packet of course yeah what it what are

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these pygmies packing do they have pygmy

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sized penises or like man-sized yeah you

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got a little stanking you're hanging on

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what's going on there dude that would be

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a that would be amazing if they just had

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normal dude sized penises on like little

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bodies might be what if their vaginas

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are just as big yeah I mean like that'd

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be very disappointing if you're a pygmy

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trying to be sexist towards your your

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wife yeah give her an orgasm sure

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absolutely I'm great with you yeah

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pussy's way too big oh that's actually

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maybe they're more evolved their [\h__\h]

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are human sized mm-hmm and therefore the

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pygmy penises can't get them to come and

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so they're more evolved civilization

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because they never get their women to

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have orgasms and bite and therefore

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they're never great or sexist or

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whatever it is you're are you I feel

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yeah yeah it so it all makes sense well

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I guess only if you dissect it as much

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as we do yeah when you're trying to loop

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it all back around sure yeah what uh

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modern-day research of sexuality between

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a man and women into a pygmy tribe I

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don't know if it's gonna work but I how

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[\h__\h] bad sorry I just thinking about

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all the the second the pygmy thing I

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love the Bigfoot stuff yes

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validates this idea that what couldn't

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there be [\h__\h] out there there supposedly

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tribes that people are still finding and

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all this stuff but yeah like how [\h__\h]

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good do you have it to start bitching

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about the fact that men want you to get

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have an orgasm yeah exactly a good is

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your life how [\h__\h] privileged are you

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yeah Jesus Christ as well comes down to

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like how bored are you to find reasons

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to complain the grand I can play a

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little [\h__\h] time

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she's about mundane [\h__\h] I don't

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complain about how I'm living complain

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about like importance I'm gonna get

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fresh free to today that's normal fresh

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[\h__\h] attitude you little [\h__\h]

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yeah that stinky [\h__\h] of yours

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goddamnit you piece of [\h__\h] [\h__\h] yeah

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[\h__\h] give me where's your [\h__\h]

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menus no words there's a bunch of

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pictures on the [\h__\h] menu I can't

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read it drive-through knows no words

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that there's no words there bring a

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sound board through the drive-thru and

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have somebody report it yeah just got

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theirs they want to marry a guy and a

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babe alright sir pull through I mean how

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can we serve you fresh I'm a bisexual so

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does that mean you want a mocha chai

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latte or something I'm thinking about

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coming out all right thank you should

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alright please pull it around

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[Music]

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do you like to supersize that for 99

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cents [\h__\h] thing okay what does that

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mean what does that mean what does that

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mean um alright we're gonna carry it

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we're I think it's time to get through

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some headlines here we a long way to go

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guys

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thing I had to say is if you look at the

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thumbnail of the YouTube video it's

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is probably just a normal size do you

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mean longer ya know what if it's

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stronger it's so big that they has to

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carrying did see his loops out around on

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the front he holds it like a few feet

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off to the side let's see if that's the

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case you could jump rope with it and

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then when you plant your flag in the

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ground you're actually sticking your dog

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on the ground

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so all right whatever and that's all

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sexist yeah very very sexist absolutely

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yeah I'm on board with sexism I like it

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dude I [\h__\h] hate women men suck too

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come on excuse me

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how you Pam so good thanks Alex yeah I'm

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sorry I apologize

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we apologize still have ran into him I'm

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still looking for him got my eyes peeled

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I think yeah go to the local barbecue

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place you got a barbecue place down

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there in Austin oh no there's no

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barbecue places here yeah hard to

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believe no I haven't seen any I'll ask

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around

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where's the ads you guys kept barbecue

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or is there only one place you could you

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guys have a Tim Horton's okay good can't

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get barbecue a Tim Horton's is fresh I

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need a barbecue sandwich at six o'clock

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in the morning do you have a here in

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Texas you have barbecue Timbits they're

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probably so down there yeah barbecued

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balls that's what we do I think it's

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time for the [\h__\h] news now it's time

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for the news

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all right this Punisher where every